I’m not going to lie to you, January thru March have been tough. It started with Zion’s surgery which I already wrote about. Then Nick’s right foot was in major pain. He could barely walk and wasn’t able to help out. Zion went through a weird tired spurt and threw off any sort of schedule we had. A few weeks later, our entire house had the stomach flu and Zion’s lingered for a week and a half.
I was having major back pain, and even normal daily activities were painful, on top of trying to take care of Zion and Nick. For about a week, Zion started waking up at ridiculous times in the morning and we could not get him back to sleep so I was very much struggling with lack of sleep. Then, Nick’s other foot started hurting him and we found out he has a small fracture. Don’t get me wrong. There have been some really great moments from these past three months, but it just feels like there has been one small inconvenience after another. The good times just seem so few. I don’t say all this to say “Whoa is us! Please feel bad for us.” NO! Not at all. I say all this because this is reality. This is life. Sucky things happen.
Life can be hard and challenging. We are all going through something (some worse than others), but to each of us, in those moments, life is hard. It’s in these moments that we have to be careful.
1 Peter 5:7 says “Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.”
The enemy is always looking to destroy us, so why wouldn’t he attack when we are at our lowest? Nick and I struggled a lot through these different challenging weeks. Discouragement, frustration, pain, sorrow, selfishness, and impatience (to name a few) were constantly poking at our minds.I can’t fully speak for him, but I personally hit moments that I felt so weak, very emotional, and like I couldn’t endure much longer. There were some tears (I blame pregnancy for making me soft!) and some frustrated comments that I should have kept to myself. The route of it all? Well sin…but more specifically pride and selfishness and allowing or falling prey to the lies and discouragement of the enemy. (Please take the time to read 1 Peter 5:7-11 as it is such a great reminder for all of us in trying times.)
We both had to practice holding onto God’s truths, taking every thought captive, keeping Jesus at the forefronts of our minds, being patient, respectful and loving towards one another, and simply praying A LOT.
“We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.”
2 Corinthians 10:5
“Cast your cares on the Lord and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous be shaken.”
Psalm 55:22
During the month of February I worked through a book called the 30-day Husband Encouragement challenge. I HIGHLY recommend every wife to go through this book because it opens your eyes to areas of your marriage that you need to improve on, change, or simply remember and cultivate. I plan to do it a few times a year. Anyways, I felt it necessary during this month to work to be a better, encouraging wife for my husband with all that was going on at the beginning of this year, and little did I know there was more to come. I do believe it reshaped my mindset, reminded me what was important, and helped us get through these difficult times. We as wives have a large calling on our lives to respect and support our husbands. And the best part?! When we are walking in the will of God serving our husbands, they in return cherish and love us more the way Christ designed for them. Neither of us are perfect, but marriage can be so rich and great if we are both functioning in our gifts, submitting to the Father, and serving one another. So if you are a wife, I encourage you to encourage your husband, especially if you are in a trial or challenging time right now.
“for it is God who works in you to will and to act in order to fulfill his good purpose.”
Philippians 2:3
But we have to surrender to Him as Lord of our lives. Then we get to sit back and watch Him work in and through us.
Despite our best intentions, all of these setbacks hindered us from doing the one thing we felt was best in reaching and inviting more people to church: walking our neighborhood and knocking on doors.
There was one night, during Nick’s foot pain, our sicknesses, and sleep deprivation that we were feeling extra defeated and discouraged. We were stuck inside, resting, healing, taking care of our son and not able to do anything to grow our church and further God’s Kingdom, which is the main reason we are up here. That night, Nick read some scriptures, specifically Psalm 127:1-2. He shared with me what God was teaching him during this challenge. These verses talk about the vanity in working in one’s own strength. The Lord is the one who does the work, even while His beloved sleeps. We can rest while the Lord watches over us. We don’t need to toil in vain. Nick reminded me and we were encouraged that the situation we are in right now is not allowing us to do what we feel we are led to do, but we don’t have to fret because the Lord is at work always, even while we are asleep.
“In their hearts humans plan their course, but the LORD establishes their steps.”
Proverbs 16:9
And once again, God has proven that He is in control and will build His church. We just had our 6th house church service this past weekend. We have had a new person visit each week and after their first Sunday they have continued coming. God is so good! We look forward to each Sunday and are excited about this little church family God has brought to us. We plan to have them all stay on Easter Sunday for a delicious lunch after service since we don’t have family around to celebrate with.
I’ve met a few mama friends and am working to cultivate good relationships with them. Not to just bring them to church, but to find friends that my children and I can hangout with. Nick is still unable to meet our neighbors, go to the gym or play basketball, but he is staying strong and spending his time praying and discipling the men in our church already. Stephanie and I decided to switch our morning Bible study to evenings starting next week in hopes to get more women to join us since most people we are meeting work during the day. We have three, possibly four, that plan to come and we are praying more in.
So what do you do when you feel the Spirit is leading you one way and then something gets in the way? When you feel called to take action and then you physically can’t? When setback after setback hinder and discourage you?
“Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, ‘Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.’”
Hebrews 13:5
“Turn your eyes upon Jesus
Look full in his wonderful face
And the things of earth will grow strangely dim
In the light of his glory and grace”
So fast forward, we are starting a new month! Praise Jesus! Most of these challenges are behind us and we have gained new strength, perspective, and are feeling encouraged. Nick is currently in a boot trying to stay off his feet as much as possible. We are doing much better and know that God is still good. We have a different attitude and are leaning not on our own understanding or desires but trusting in the Lord and His sovereignty with all our hearts. We are beyond blessed and I look back and feel silly for complaining or struggling, so I’ll end today with this verse.
“Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.”
Romans 5:3-5
Thank you Jesus for growing us through these trials, for showing us Your love and power and allowing the Holy Spirit to transform us. I ask in Your name that You would encourage the hearts of the people reading this that they too may find joy in their suffering. Lord, I pray that hearts would be transformed and Your Name would go forth. Use us despite our weaknesses and shortcomings. Help us persevere through the setbacks and trust in Your Sovereignty. May we each surrender our lives over to You daily and walk in Your will proclaiming Your Name to everyone we meet.
“Jesus replied, “What is impossible with man is possible with God.”
Luke 18:27
Jess T.
Prayer Requests
Healing for Nick’s foot
Run from sin, hold every thought captive, don’t believe the lies and discouragements
Keep pursuing Jesus with all our hearts and be good witnesses up here for His Kingdom
That God would continue to bring us new visitors each week
Health and safety for our family
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